Karita Messy Parkir..

Aku bukan orang yang hobi-hobi amat belanja (alaaahhh..kata siapa;p). I mean, I’m not that kind of boutique to boutique, shop to shop shopaholic. Instead, aku selalu belanja di tempat2 yang itu ituuu aja. Ada beberapa spot belanja favorit, termasuk Karita Muslim Square -Griya Muslim Muda- (cie..lengkap banget). Meskipun nggak selalu nemu baju lucu disini, aku selalu antusias dengan kunjunganku ke karita. Pokokna mah, hidup karita! Tapi suka sebel kalo udah deket2 ramadhan ama lebaran. Toko jadi rame banget. Mana yang beli suka pada heboh lagi. Mbok ya elegan dikit..

Beberapa waktu lalu, aku ke karita. Sendirian, secara skuadron belanja lagi pada sibuk. Kunjungan lumayan berhasil dengan terbelinya baju kuning yang ada obi-nya (YAY..akhirnya, punya juga gue baju ada obi-nya). Secara di jogja ini aku adalah pengendara tetap kendaraan roda dua, tiap kali habis dari somewhere pasti nyiapin uang parkir dong. Nah, aku ini lumayan pelanggan yang baik loo. Sebelum keluar toko, aku biasanya sudah nyiapin uang parkir, biar gak buru2. Sebisanya nyari uang pas, biar bapaknya gak repot kasih kembalian. Belum lagi kebiasaanku ngucapin terimakasih (dih, penting ya dicantumin?). NAH, kemarin2 itu, waktu aku habis dari karita, tumben2 nih aku agak buru2. Tapi aku jelas inget sudah ngasih uang buat parkir (maaf ya sodara2, meskipun buru2, aku bukan tipe pelanggan yang main cabut gitu aja gak bayar parkir). Berhubung buru2, aku ngucapin makasih sambil lalu dan siap pergi. Udah mulai jalan malah.. dan terjadilah insiden itu.

Si bapak parkir dengan hebohnya triak manggil aku : MBAK MBAK..TUNGGU EEEYYY.. !!!!
Doh, aku jelas nggak siap dong di triakin gitu! I mean, aku kan udah bayar . Jelas inget kok.. dan secara bapaknya manggil aku dengan desibel suara yang jaya, jelas dong semua orang dipinggir jalan nengok. Tengsin gak sih…

Bapak parkir mendekat, dan tolong ya itu, udah didepan ku juga, masih kenceng aja triaknya: UANG PARKIRNYA MBAK..

Belum selesai bapaknya ngomong sudah kupotong: SAYA UDAH BAYAR KOK PAAKKK.. (kataku dengan desibel yang sama jaya-nya. Biar orang2 denger. Ini murni kesalah pahaman lo).

Bapaknya, dengan senyum: IYA, UDAH BAYAR EMANG. TAPI INI KEMBALIAN 9000-NYA MAU DITINGGAL??.

Oh.. TERNYATA, saking buru2nya, aku salah ngambil uang di dompet. Yang keambil 10.000. ya jelas dong bapaknya ngejar2. Heuheuheuheu….. jadi maluuuw..

Ini kan tanggung jawab bersama..

Ada berita yang lumayan mencuri perhatian pas aku baca Republika edisi Rabu, 6 Agustus 2008. Berita dengan judul ‘kaum adam penyebab baby boom 2’. Indonesia pernah mengalami baby boom beberapa puluh tahun lalu yang kemudian bisa ‘ditanggulangi’ dengan program KB. Keberhasilan program KB sendiri sering dianggap sebagai bukti keberhasilan pembangunan Era Soeharto (tapi dosenku pernah menyampaikan di kelas kalau program itu bisa berhasil soalnya banyak rakyat kecil yang di-intimidasi segitu rupanya supaya berpartisipasi aktif dalam program dua anak cukup).

Anyway, yang menarik dari artikel di republika tadi itu adalah, dalam waktu 7 tahun lagi, dikhawatirkan akan terjadi baby boom2 (yah, 7 tahun lagi bukannya waktu produktif kita buat punya anak? Wah…gawat aja nih). Menurut BKKBN, kaum adam pantas dipersalahkan karena TERNYATA buu, keikutsertaan laki2 dalam program KB hanya mencapai 1,5 persen. Dalam artian, secara tidak langsung, tanggung jawab perempuan-lah untuk menjaga keseimbangan angka kelahiran. Kenapa sampai ada angka yang luar biasa timpang begitu, Stigma masyarakat jelas bermain (and of course, that damn patriarchy system). Tapi rendahnya partisipasi laki2 dalam rogram KB juga harus disikapi dengan benar. Ya gimana mau aktif kalau jumlah alat kontrasepsi –nya saja sangat terbatas. Belum lagi penyuluhan tentang KB yang lebih ditargetkan kepada kaum ibu. Padahal kan urusan tentang anak dan segala tetek bengeknya harusnya melibatkan kedua orang tua.

Urusan tentang KB sendiri lumayan menjadi kontroversi ya kayaknya? I mean, ada beberapa yang menolak dengan pertimbangan agama dan sebagainya. Tenang, itu tidak akan dibahas disini dan memang bukan aku yang cukup kompeten untuk membahasnya. Tapi yang jelas, urusan kelahiran dan sebagainya itu implikasi-nya sangat besar lo sama kualitas generasi mendatang. Jadi menurutku, lepas dari boleh tidaknya kita membatasi jumlah anak, yang jelas kita harus tetap menempatkan life quality sebagai prioritas. Kalau dengan alasan tertentu, beberapa dari kita memutuskan punya anak sebanyak mungkin tetapi tanpa didukung kemampuan dan manajemen perhatian yang jitu, apa ya berefek positif ke anak? Menurutku, semua tetap pakai syarat dan ketentuan berlaku (emang provider GSM aja yang bisa pake syarat dan ketentuan berlaku? Urusan anak juga loo :D)

Happy August part 1..

Okay, so far in 2008, I decide to choose august as my most favorite month:D. February is always special for me, this year also. But august? Waow…

Here in August, I met so much fun and experiences and laughs and lessons… bonus, there are also many people around me who celebrate something in august. Isn’t that just great??.

Can’t say by words how happy I was when my friend and sister WINDA came to jogja for about 3days. She brought countless funny stories. I really recommend her to write her own book ‘diary akhwat sejuta tuntutan’ :D. Few days ahead, I had terrible yet outstanding 4 days professional experience as Note Taker for Sub Regional South East Asian Education NGO workshop. It was terrible because I simply lost my time to sleep and eat. I touched the laptop more intense than anything in several days.

Fortunately, I had great partner, IKA, and great committee. With no doubt, we worked under pressure and deadline, but thank God, I had not met such a miserable feeling with that:D. For me personally, the tension wouldn’t be that high because I didn’t have upcoming big events. But for IKA who will have the final thesis presentation just two days after the workshop ended, I believe the tension was double higher:D. She did it well in fact. YAY… congratulation for officially being S.IP. You go girl… the workshop also enables me to get closer to the real life of NGO-ers. So far, the best thing I can see about them is, they have really dynamic, alive, and fun ways of life. Firstly, I told myself to be ready for formal meeting. Instead, the atmosphere was so friendly. They opened the workshop by DRAWING in a wide colorless canvas. The participants were divided into some group based on nationality. So, the drawing represents the education problem of each country in SEA. Surprisingly, they have great drawing:D.


Back to the joyful of August, I must say happy birthday for TINUS, my co partner in wahana, who celebrates his birthday in August 11. Actually, I prefer to call him tincus, or titin:D. He came to wahana just a moment before my resignation (when I forced to acknowledge that I had not enough time for part time job and I had to give it up). Even when he was still training employee, he has gained our attention for his warm hilarious personalities (and his famous goyang dombret. Beuh….u can’t ask for more:D). Plus, he has fat chubby funny physical appearance. Soo..yeah..Those kinds of guys are commonly warm and fun! .

Well, this is the first report of August Happy Moment. There will be the sequel of ‘Happy August’. Don’t miss it… heuheuheuheu… Messy Greeting from Messy Blog Owner…

my sister and i

My two years younger sister and I are two very different personalities.
She has straight, long, definitely black hair which I don’t have.
She has insanely white skin, something that I don’t find in my skin.
I’m an ambitious while she lets her life flows completely.
I’m a lot like our dad. She is a lot like our mom.
I love reading anything. She hates reading but comics and novels.
The way she dresses up herself represents young girl pop-simple style (skinny jeans, long t-shirt, and cardigan). The way I dress up myself? Well, you guys know how.

Few days ago, I helped her re-arrange her room. She picked up the things from old room to the new one. I did design interior (one of our differences. I think I have better sense or art;p). My job took a long time because in fact, my lovely sister LOVES TO KEEP HER STUFFS, even the old and broken stuffs.

Kardus bungkus jam beker (‘kan lumayan mpok, kali aja bisa jadi bungkus lain’)
Gantungan hp rusak (‘lha itu bola2nya lucu e, kan sayang’)
Plastic bekas laundry! (‘kan gede mbak! Bisa buat tempat baju kotor lagi, hehe’)
Botol bungkus garnier yang isinya sudah habis (‘belinya mahal sih’)
Kertas karton nggak jelas. bekas ospek kali ya? (‘itu kan kenang2an, teteh’)
Kartu ucapan ulang tahun ke17 yang udah buluk banget (menghargai dong! Kan dikasih orang).

Sigh… at the moment, I realize, we are so identical : D. me too, love doing that thing. I mean, keeping my stuffs. Maybe even worse…

Kertas Koran bekas bungkus oleh2 ndes dari amerika.
Tiket bis ke semarang sama tante ellie. Tiket kereta ke Jakarta sama Hilda.
Bekas bungkus kado monokurobo dari emak.
Tiket tol. Tiket 21. Tiket nonton Ramayana ballet.
Kertas nota. Kumpulan kertas chatingan temen2 sekelas di sela2 kuliah. Berkas BUJS.

Hohohoho… we have thing in common!! We love our stuffs and keep them for the sake of memory ;D. And by the way, it makes the room make over always takes a long time.
At the bottom line, my sister and I are not that much different after all. When I look our family picture a little bit closer and longer, I can see that we have the same smile.

sujud itu....

Dua hari kemarin, salah satu temenku dari semarang datang ke jogja. Sudah menjadi tradisi kalau mereka yang main kesini (I mean, jogja) pasti transitnya ke tempatku (secara kamarku gede dan kasurnya luas:D. dan tentu karena aku orang yang menyenangkan :D :D).

selama dua malem dia nginep disini, kita cerita banyaaaaak sekali hal. Satu cerita yang paling berkesan adalah cerita dosen-nya yang dulunya non islam trus masuk islam setelah diskusi sama satu tokoh (lupa namanya gw) yang ditemui di seminar entrepreneurship (yak, silahkan bingung :D).

Jadi pada intinya, yang bikin dosen temenku itu akhirnya memutuskan untuk masuk islam adalah jawaban dari tokoh itu tentang islam. Bahwa keindahan islam adalah sujud. Sujud dalam arti yang sebenar benarnya. Bersujud adalah satu bentuk pernyataan dari kita bahwa kita memang powerless dibanding Allah. Ada kepasrahan dan keikhlasan dalam sujud. Sujud adalah wujud dari kerendahan hati kita terhadap bumi. Dan sujud jugalah yang mencegah kita dari menjadi sombong terhadap apa2 yang kita punya di dunia. Saking powerful-nya sujud, sampai2 setan sangat benci terhadap orang yang bersujud (katanya). Kalo aku ndak salah dengar, kayaknya ada juga ya anjuran untuk melamakan sujud dalam aktivitas solat kita (eh, iya nggak sih? Rasanya aku pernah dengar dimana gitu. Kalo ada yang tau share ya..).

Okay, aku agak2 tercenung (cieee) demi mendenger cerita temenku tadi. That Islam has a lot of beautiful things and values, I know for sure. Tapi menonjolkan sujud sebagai keindahan islam? Itu bener2 satu hal yang fantastis buatku. Dan sekaligus sesuatu yang ‘nonjok’ mengingat betapa jarangnya aku sujud dalam arti yang sebenarnya. Sujud yang ikhlas, sujud yang pasrah. Bahkan jujur, aku seringkali Cuma menganggap sujud sebagai bagian dari aktivitas harian, solat, dan bukan merupakan bentuk kepasrahan. Duh, jadi merasa bersalah :’(.

Padahal memang kalau dipikir2, apa sih yang lebih humble dan indah daripada sujud?
Subhanallah…

ps: sebenernya ada juga sedikit pembahasan tentang sujud di bukuya karen armstrong yang sejarah islam. tapi aku lupa bawa :P. mungkin akan ada edisi revisi besok...

In her shoes..

I hear many times people say: Put your feet in someone else’s shoes. That’s how we feel what someone else feels. I was previously blind about that term. BUT Since I was little girl, people all the time come to me and tell their stories. Don’t ask me why they do; even I never know for sure why they have to pick me. Time goes by and here I am now, find out the 21 year old me still do the same thing, listening people’s story:D. For me personally, I’m okay with that thing. I enjoy my role as good listener and adviser. I love my part as a shelter.

I love listening people’s stories. I learn a lot from them. At the end of their stories, I usually conclude something. I feel sorry for their tragic stories and promise to myself to be more carefully run my life. Experience is the best teacher. But it doesn’t have to be my own. In many times, I also meet great people with heartwarming and inspiring stories of life.

Commonly, at the end of our sharing session (between me and my ‘client’), I receive comments like ‘thank you so much. You understand me a lot. That’s all I need’. Or thing like: “thank God. That’s helpful”, and “thanks for being there for me”. When I hear people say that way, I feel so honored and happy. All I need to do is giving some minutes –sometimes one or two hours- from my 24 hours. That’s simple and I can make someone feels better.

However, there are also times when people close their stories with the words “you just don’t know what I feel!” Or things like: “you could never imagine being me” and “you’re thin. You don’t know how it feels to be an ugly fat girl”. Okay, to receive that such comment is pretty hurting. I remember one of the worst you-don’t-how-it-feels-like moments. One day, my best friend came to me to tell her story. She and I had a different idea in viewing the problem. At the end of the sharing session, she cried, yelled at me, told me that I was not her best friend and then just walked away, leaving me in a wretched and hollow feeling.

Ok, my best friend joined you-don’t-know-how-it-feels-like club. It hurts me so bad because I have tried my best. At the moment, I just realized that it is really hard to be in her shoes. Shoes are very personal and so is some one’s feeling. No matter how hard I try, I can never really feel what she feels. What my best friend has done was not entirely wrong, although she showed it in a frantic manner.

After spending some times thinking about this little yet complicated problem, I then can perceive something. When people come to me and share their stories, understanding them is important. But actually, I don’t have to try too hard. For me, my most important thing to do is providing my time, my attention -and my ears- and let them sharing.

If they think I help them, it will be great. But if they don’t, I should not take it too emotionally. Everyone has their own idea in viewing something. When we, people and I, have different point of view, then we must see it as something normal. If my suggestions fit with them, I’ll be glad. If they don’t, I shall not be sad. It doesn’t mean that I am bad listener. It only means that we are different. The most important part is, each of us have done our job. They tell the stories, I listen to their stories. I now never push too hard to act as good listener. There are still some moments when people say to me ‘you don’t know how it feels like!’ but i'm perfectly fine with that.. I’ll acknowledge that maybe I can’t understand them that well. and I will wholeheartedly realize that my suggestions are not the best ones. That’s okay. I learn one more things. Even so, a fact that sometimes I fail to act a good listener doesn’t lessen my passion. I still enjoy my part as a shelter after all…. And by the way, me and my best friend (who used to yell at me and joined you-don’t-know-how-it-feels-like club) are fine now